The Moment I Became an Online Teacher.

On Tuesday, March 17, 2020, around 5 pm, I took a walk with my husband around the block. It was like any other walk. Our dog was pulling on the leash when I remember saying, “I wouldn’t even be surprised if we (our school) started back again next week.

You see, the last week has not been normal. COVID-19 has hit the U.S., and it has unexpectedly changed our lives. We don’t know the measure of its nature, but our lives are changing (wether good or bad), they are changing.

As I walked in from our walk, I plopped down on our brown oversized chair, I checked my phone. My prayer partner, who teaches 3rd grade in Texas, Facebook messaged me:

“Did your school close indefinitely? My friend said Kansas schools were closed the remainder of the year.”

“Oh I haven’t heard that. I know they have a group of people trying to make a decision by tomorrow. I know one country is closed until April 3 but that’s it.” I reassured her.

Then I checked Facebook….

I quickly responded back to her as to not look like a fool, not knowing what was even going on in my own state.

“Oh my gosh, I actually just read that now! I’m so confused to how I’m supposed to teach.”

Shocked. Confused. Bewildered.

How am I supposed to teach 22 kindergarteners online?

So many ideas and problems ran through my mind all at the same time. That night, I felt I was living in a dream. Not a fantastic, delightful dream. An “I’m out of place” dream. “This isn’t my life” dream. As if I will wake up on Monday, go back to work, set up my classroom, and welcome their 22 bright faces with morning hugs. But that won’t be the case, and I’m not upset about it.

I’m not upset about it because even though I might not see some of these kids for a couple months. I won’t get to wrap my arms around them or get to tell them I love them in person, I will get to some day and that is the point.

In these next couple of months, we might not have many more cases of COVID-19. We might not know of anyone that dies or gets extremely sick in our county. If that’s the case PRAISE THE LORD! But if we don’t go down this path of closing the school building, we might see extreme sickness. We might see students get sick and even pass away.

You see that’s the purpose of all this. The purpose is that I can see my kids for years to come.

Next August, I will get to give them the biggest hug in the world, hear about their summers, and cheer them on to first grade. I’ll blink, and then I will get to see them heading into middle school. Then, I will get to see them graduating high school and making beautiful lives for themselves. I will get to see them living!

With the help of my colleagues and school district, I know I will figure out how to teach 22 kinders online. I know they are not done learning this year, and I’m not done teaching. I know there will be tears and hardship, but I know this is best, and if I have to sacrifice my time with them now to celebrate them later, I will.

It’s not a goodbye, it’s a SEE you later.